(originally posted to substack 18.8.25)

I have felt a deep yearning for the crispness of autumn recently. Summer has come late this year to Copenhagen, and with it I feel a kind of fatigue that I find hard to put into words. As much as I love the endless days of the summer months (when we are lucky to get them here), I find the novelty wears off quickly. Having grown up in rainy Scotland, I am not used to so many days of good weather in a row. I am sure many other Brit’s will attest to this feeling of ‘making the most’ of the weather whenever we are blessed with sun.

And so, I have decided today that perhaps I do not need to wait until the season changes to create those cosy moments for myself, despite the warmth outside. I write this sitting on my sofa in the flickering of candle light. It’s only just dark outside, and yet I have created this small moment of magic for myself that evokes that sense of safety that only the darker months can truly bring. I realised this evening that I do not have to wait. I can create moments of magic for myself like this, whenever I choose. These yearnings do not need to be put on hold until the ‘right time’ or until I decide I am ‘ready’. If I keep waiting for that, these things will forever remain yearnings, existing solely within the confines of my heart.

We spend so much of our lives awaiting permission to be, seek, embrace certain things. We think that someone outside of ourselves must be the one to grant us that permission. It rarely occurs to us that the only person that can truly grant such wishes is ourselves. We scroll, we distract, we numb ourselves from the things that call to us from deep within our souls, perhaps because we feel we must earn them, perhaps just because that’s what we’ve always done. Yet this evening I am reminded that this kind of contentment that I feel in this moment cannot be earned, but simply sought out and embraced. I spent most of the evening prior to this scrolling, ignoring the pull towards this quiet moment with myself on the page, illuminated by flickering candlelight, serenaded by the tinkling keys of the piano music playing in the room. Part of me reaches towards feeling shame for having done so, but the other part of me recognises that it is far more important to acknowledge that I made this moment exist in the end; no matter how long it may have taken. It may have come later than it could have, yet I am here, experiencing it anyway.

In this moment I remind myself that showing up for yourself imperfectly, or later than hoped, is better than not showing up for yourself at all. What is important is that I am here, now, writing these words; perhaps late but at least not never. And so, dear reader, I hope this serves to give you a reminder that you are allowed to give yourself permission to take what you need, to follow those yearnings no matter how big or small. Create moments of magic that may be construed as frivolous by others. It is not frivolous if it is what your heart desires. Think of all the moments of quiet, simple joy we could sprinkle throughout our days, our lives, if we just gave ourselves permission to do so. There is no reason that we have to resign ourselves to the ‘monotony’ of the everyday if we do not wish to. We have the power to decide otherwise, most of the time, in big and small ways.

What things do you yearn for that you could give yourself permission to pursue or create?

What magic could you infuse into your every day if you decided to follow these yearnings?

The possibilities could be endless.