I haven’t had a day like this in a while, spent getting outside, seeking inspiration and calmly, gently turning inwards. I used to spend almost every day like this, that time felt so peaceful, so slow. when life is busy, it can be easy to be swept away by an increasing momentum, and peace and intention can become difficult to keep within our grasp.

I realised last night that this idea of a slow and intentional life is what feels like success to me. A life through which I am moving with grace and authenticity towards the things that make me glow from the inside out. A life that is deeply rooted and grounded in my truth, in which I feel connected to people, spaces and things that fill me with joy and inspiration and passion. A successful life in my eyes is one that feels good to the one that is honoured to live and experience it. We can chase every achievement and accolade under the Sun and call it success but unless we truly allow ourselves to fully feel and witness and acknowledge each season and aspect of our lives, we will never truly experience that feeling of success. Many of us chase thing after thing to seek that sense of purpose and meaning in our lives, convincing ourselves that if we can just… Life will feel good. each milestone we pass feels good for such a fraction of a second that we could almost miss it all together.

I’m coming to understand that it is not the achievements and goals we tick off the never ending list that create a feeling of success and meaning but the narratives we spin and believe about our lives in the day to day. If we keep telling ourselves we will feel good and purposeful and happy when… Will never feel it. because we’re anchoring the evocation of those feelings on something outside of ourselves. we are putting our emotional and mental well-being in the hands of anyone but ourselves and that’s an incredibly risky place to put it. we are handing over our power, our centre, our peace to things out-with our control. I know it’s hard to accept that in order to feel good we need to take control of our own lives, our own emotions. It can feel daunting and overwhelming and exhausting to even think about the kind of awareness it seems like it’s going to take to anchor your energy and emotional vibration within yourself. Believe me, I know. it’s an overwhelm I’ve wallowed in many times, the knowledge that in order to feel that sense of achievement and purpose and alignment that I crave, I have to do some inner work to anchor that internally instead of externally. It means a hell of a lot of examining narratives and thought patterns, a Letting Go and rewriting it all to fit our own definitions of what is true and authentic.

but we also have so much time. A whole lifetime to try things out to decide what resonates for us and what does not. we won’t always get it right. getting it wrong is deeply encouraged, for there is as much to be learnt in the things that don’t feel good as there is in what does. what feels good will evolve and change as we evolve and change because of it. seasons come and go and nothing truly lasts forever. SSome seasons will be darker than others and feeling good might feel distant and unachievable. that’s just how life is sometimes. it is in these moments we must cradle ourselves with care and compassion and focus on what we can do, no matter how small, to slowly navigate through the dark season towards a place where more light resides. baby steps are still steps and these periods need time and patience to be navigated. Some days, your definition of good will be smaller than others and that’s ok. sometimes good really means okay and sometimes it means ecstatic. the important thing is to write that definition for yourself without an outside influence telling you how are you should feel. Whatever feels good and right and true to you is your definition and you have every right to live your life based upon your definition alone. just as long as the pen is in your hands, just as long as the words that make up the definition flow from your heart and your knowing in the present moment, you’ll find the truth, find the right way to go.

defining what a successful life is for yourself is a lifelong journey that will include getting lost, navigating unfamiliar territory, getting to know that territory as the seasons change and you advance along the path you choose to take. It looks like stopping, slowing down, turning back and choosing a different route when you feel you have lost your centre. It looks like recalibrating, re-grounding, finding your centre once more at every twist, turn and rest stop to ensure you are following your most aligned and authentic truth. and at the very core it is following that truth, that knowing that resides deep within you to live out your own definition of a successful life. You must follow that voice deep within yourself instead of blindly following the voices out there telling you what your life should look and feel like. Only you know what things make your life feel good on a day-to-day level. Only you know what things ground you in a sense of purpose and achievement and alignment in your life. only you know what success looks like to you. that pen is in your hands.

if I have only one wish for you it is that you have the courage to write the story of your life as authentically and as unashamedly as you possibly can. SuSuccess is not a big house, a fancy car, a big job, a shiny life (unless that’s what feels aligned for you, in that case go for it my love). SuSuccess is feeling a story you are living a life that is authentically your own, following your own definitions, your own knowing of what your life is supposed to look and feel like. and so, in this way, I pray that you live a life that is successful and abundant on your own terms. may you always remember that it is you that holds the pen in your hand. go ahead and write your own story, in your own time. let it flow from within you, let your truth unfold before your eyes.

if you want to hear more about my journey towards a more authentic existence, follow me on instagram @the.authenticity.project and on medium . see my photography work on instagram @s.ophiea.lice and connect with me on linkedin.

big love to you all x